When A Parent Realizes ..

At your youngest is when a Father should be a daughter’s first love, and some say a Mother should be a son’s first love. Either way you look at it, you need both of your parents. Growing up children pay attention to a lot, who is there and who isn’t, the times people are there, the moments you share etc., that goes a long way. Things like this play a part in the person you are today. Some of us were lucky enough to have both parents, some had single family households, none of that stopped me.

As parents, what you should realize is that what you and your child(ren)’s parent go through is NOT the child’s fault. No one ever asks for life, we are just blessed with it. If you aren’t sure you are able to handle your emotions around your child, you should probably figure positive ways of life. I say this because, some tend to argue in front of their child, or say things that aren’t so nice, which can cause a child to feel as though they are the reason for your problems. Do you know how that feels? Honestly? I’ve heard of parents saying things such as “You look just like your dad so bad I can’t even look at you, because I am upset.” You think at the age of 3 and up a child doesn’t understand, they feed off of bodily behavior, what they see, what they hear, they repeat. This is how we set bad examples in school, or in an open environment.

Favoritism is likely to happen between children yet should not. You should love all of your children the same, whether or not they have the same dad, or same mom. You can expect favoritism from a child to parents within a split household. It’s not that the child wants the other parent because “They let them do whatever they want,” but because that parent is more focused on the child and not their issues when it’s time to have their child. Different environments also play a role, in today’s generation you can give a child a tablet, and they’ll TEACH YOU a thing or two. But if that child was like me, and likes to experiment the world, he or she will want more of a connection and spending time even if it’s to talk about nothing. You’d be surprised what a “Okay, not right now,” can do to a child, because when is there ever time? Be happy your child talks, Covid messed a lot of us up, believe it or not some children are scared to even see another child outside of their families. Social distancing has distanced us A LOT.

Always remember whatever you are going through is not your child’s fault. You’ll regret some of the biggest memories you missed out on chasing behind or arguing with, instead of tending to someone who is no longer looking for your love and support. Now, your child no longer “needs you,” or “wants you,” and that’s a bad feeling that sticks with a parent forever, trust me I know.

Literaturebyjessc ( Jessica Hunter )

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