When Am I Most Happy?

When are you most happy?

Believe it or not, they always say your happiness comes first, your happiness matters. I’m most happy when those around me, even those I don’t talk to on a daily are happy even if I am not the cause. You know why? Because i’m not selfish, I know my time is coming. I know other people are going through things way harder than what I am going through.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve been experiencing some terrible health issues, forms of depression, and anxiety, but I remain humble. If I let someone see me down, I’m letting someone down. There is always that one person watching who depends on you to make their day go by smoothly. Though I can’t always be that one person every time, I try. That’s all that matters, that I try. It makes people upset when they can’t get to you, but the bible says “No weapon formed against you may prosper,” this means trials and tribulations may come my way, but somehow I always overcome them. Learning my family history explains the things I’ve been going through and experiencing. No one can withstand what I’ve gone through with a clear head. Realizing that while I’m trying to get myself together to help others is a huge step in taking accountability. I may have made many mistakes, but they were with good intentions. I’ve lost friends in the process of my growth, and health issues, and am I happy with that? Yes and no. It shows how selfish some can be, but it also shows who cares when things are hard for you. Who understands you during the darkest hours of your life, and there is no one to blame but me. I’m happy even when I’m down because the devil saw me with my head down, and was happy until I said “Amen”. You have to have faith that all bad things will eventually come to an end. I’m still fighting certain battles, but I’m happy with that. I’m happy that I wake up each morning because someone else didn’t. I’m happy that even though I experience pain, I’m able to make the right decisions for myself. I may not make the right decisions all the time, and that’s where I learn. Learning is fun because you can never have enough knowledge. Remain humble.

• Literaturebyjessc ( Jessica Hunter )